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Intentional choosing

Intentional choosing

Katy Hirst

11 September 2018 9:01AM

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The Community of St Anselm is a youth-oriented new monastic movement based at Lambeth Palace, the Archbishop of Canterbury’s official-residence and office in London. As the next cohort prepare for their commissioning later this month, one of last year’s members, Katy Hirst, reflects on lessons that local churches can learn from living in community.


At the end of June, myself and the 14 other people I had lived in community with for a year all left Lambeth Palace to go our separate ways – back to homes, families, churches and jobs in different places across the world. At the end of the year both the resident and non-resident community were commissioned by the Archbishop of Canterbury to go out into the world and share what we have received this year with others.

One of the things we received this year was the gift of community – of sharing every aspect of our lives with a group of diverse people. Whilst there were some challenges to this and it definitely wasn’t a utopia, there is something undeniably beautiful and special about community life. It was deep, it was authentic, it was fun, it was messy and it was warts-and-all. We all grew in love for Jesus, each other and ourselves. It was quite literally heaven on earth.

And so, I’ve been asking myself how this gift of community can be experienced in the local church. My experience of community in the local church is one of great blessing and also great disappointment. I have lodged with a family from church, been helped to move house (many times) by small group members and have been supported through challenging times.

But I’m sure I’m not the only person who has felt lonely in the Sunday-morning crowd, or who has looked over at a group of people and felt like I wasn’t cool / intelligent / married / male / funny etc enough to go and join in the conversation.

There are lots of factors that contributed to making the St Anselm community such a rich experience, but if I could pick out one that I think could help the local church grow in this area is it the fact that we all committed to a shared rule of life at the beginning of the year, and as part of that, we committed to “choose one another”.

Each of us committed to choosing every other person in that community equally – even before we met one another. This doesn’t mean that natural friendships don’t emerge, but it does mean that you can go into a room of 40 other people and without hesitation join in a conversation with any cluster of people without worrying you weren’t welcome.

This may sound trivial but I don’t think I have experienced this anywhere else in life – in or outside the church. This intentional choosing that has no partiality, that transcends personal preferences or similarities and that motivates love in action was a fundamental part of enabling St Anselm to function as a community.

So the question I will be asking myself – and the one that I invite you to ask – is “How can this ‘intentional choosing’ of one another be outworked in my church context?” How can our relationships with one another reflect and point people to the beautiful truth that God chooses each one of us?

 

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